Income Inequality

by Robert Arvay, Contributing Writer

I filed a lawsuit today to remedy income inequality.

I told the judge that since my neighbor has more money than I do, that I asked him for some of his, but he refused to give it to me.

He said that he worked hard for his money and saved it, whereas I am lazy and I spend every penny I get as soon as I get it.

He also said that he got himself educated and trained for employment, whereas I spent all my time on parties and complaining.

So what, I said to the judge. None of that excuses the injustice of income inequality. Why should I have less than he has? I deserve more.

Besides, the things he said about me injured my self esteem. I should get something for that, too.

But the judge ruled against me, and he had the audacity to say that if I wanted more money, I should earn it.

What was worse, my other neighbor sued me, because he has less than I have, and he wants some of mine. Why should I give him anything? What did he ever do for me?

I’m so angry about all this that I’m thinking of rioting and burning down my house.